A Week Without a Drink

Joe E. Lewis said it:

“I distrust camels,
and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.”

Eternal Life

There is an old joke - in which a young man hears that a wise guru possesses the secret of Eternal Life. He sets forth to find the guru and learn his secret.

He travels for days, flying to India, then hiking through the treacherous mountain passes of the Himalayas. Finally, after much painful struggle, he arrives at the cave where the ascetic guru is said to reside.

And sure enough, the old man comes out of the cave and greets his visitor happily.

“How may I help you?”

The young man replies, “I hear that you possess the secret of Eternal Life. Would you be kind enough to share it with me, O Great One?”

“Oh, yes, indeed, yes.

“First, you must refrain from eating rich foods.

“Second, you must abstain from strong drink. You writing this down?”

“Yes, of course, O Great One.”

“OK. Third, you must avoid the company of fast women, women of questionable morals.”

“Right. No rich foods, no strong drink, no slutty women. And if I follow these instructions, I will live forever?”

The old guru shook his head sadly.

“No, my son. But it will seem like it!”

take’em for what they are

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole, which she carried across her neck.

One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water, at the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water. Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments. But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream. “I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house.”

The old woman smiled, “Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side?” “Tha t ’s because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table. Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.”

Each of us has our own unique flaw. But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding. You’ve just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

SO, to all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers on your side of the path!